I Don't Want To!

We follow a pretty regular routine. Sure, there are variations - some days we have show-and-tell and other days we need to go buy sneakers. But there are some things that we do every, single, day, like it or not, no matter what. You would think that my kids would learn to accept this.

But no. No they don't. Every day after lunch Andrew informs me that he is not going to take a nap. And I then inform him that he is. And he tells me he isn't. And I say he is. I am lucky that
1 - Andrew is small enough to be distracted by the story that comes before nap and that
2 - Andy actually DOES NEED a nap, and so usually falls asleep before too long and I have to wake him up when Nick's bus gets home at 3:40.

Just this morning both Nick and Nate told me they were not going to school. "I'm not going to school!" they said. Only they were screaming so it was more like "I DON'T WANT TO GO TO SCHOOL!" And in Nick's case, an added "I'M NOT GOING!"

It's important to examine who is speaking before reacting to statements like these. There are differing translations.

Nate: I don't want to go to school
meaning - I don't want to stop playing with these toy dinosaurs.

Nick: I don't want to go to school
meaning - I don't want to go to school

In either case, the important thing is not to give in. In my case, it usually involves a lot of screaming, shouting, and threatening. I'm all for talking things out, but we're on a schedule. We have no time for coaxing or easing into the idea of school. That bus in ON IT'S WAY, like it or not, and we better be out in front when it gets there. (We weren't. We were still in the garage when it breezed on by. ) Also, more than once I have dragged a screaming or sobbing Nick and placed him on the school bus. Yes, I am heartless.

Nicholas is particularly good at refusing to do things that I require every day. These things include practicing his piano, and doing some homework. For the record, piano practice is usually just over 5 minutes and homework is writing out his spelling words - there are five of them. That's 5 minutes, and 5 words.

Nick throws tantrums like the gods of Olympus over these 5 minutes and 5 words. He refuses. He screams, he cries, he becomes angry and threatens to rip up the sheet of practice words. He scribbles on the paper. He tries writing them very quickly so that every other letter is backwards and unreadable. He tells me that he hates writing, he hates writing, that no one else has to do this homework and that I am so mean and so AWFUL and it's so unfair.

I get very angry. I want to bang my head against the wall. I want to bang HIS head against the wall.

He likes piano a little more. Especially when he finally can play something all the way through. But the writing he fights me on.

I keep having to remind myself that
1 - it's not so much that he doesn't want to write as it is he really wants to play with his brothers,
2 - it's only five words, so how unfair am I really being? and
3 - my job is to prepare him for the future, and in this case the future is first grade, where people will need to read the ideas he writes down. So being able to form letters and words needs to be a priority.
also
4 - he would have more playtime if he would shut up and do his darn jobs!