Central Park

I was going to take the kids to the planetarium on our first day in NY, but then I realized it was a beautiful day, and it was going to rain on Thursday.

So instead, we went to Central Park.

We rode the carousel. All of us.

We walked to a playground I played in when I was a kid in school. Only then Andy said he had to pee. I followed a woman who had a child dancing the dance, but it turned out she was just leading him over to a quiet spot so he could pee in a plastic bag. You know, instead of putting performance information on those bulletin boards at playgrounds, they should post something about the closest rest rooms.

Anyway, the trees were flowering, and the air was warm. The East Green was covered in flower petals, and the boys wanted to play there more than the playground. It was beautiful. We ate hot dogs from a cart for lunch. And then we got ice creams. And then we went to the boat basin, and Nick's ice cream fell.

And then Nick cried because I wouldn't buy him a second ice cream, and then Andy cried because he didn't eat his snow cone fast enough and it melted all over his pants and I made him throw the rest away. And then I tried to take the kids to the bathroom but they refused to use such a dirty toilet. And there were no paper towels there so I had to clean Nick's face by splashing water on it, so he cried more.

And then I told Nick that if he didn't stop crying, someone was going to accidentally push him in the water. And it would be me. That didn't help.

We were at the Alice statue, and Nick finally let it go to climb all over it. And then we took a cab back.


But wait, because that was only the first part of the day.

Then we went shopping with my mother, and we lost Andy at a t.j. maxx. Suddenly I turned and he was gone. GONE. I went back, but I just didn't see him, and he didn't answer me, and so instead of wandering the store shouting "ANDY? ANDY?" like a madwoman, I walked up tot he cashier and announced that I lost my three-year-old, and the shut the store down in less than ten seconds. A guy with tatoos was suddenly there asking me what he looked like. "It's OK, I'm security," he said. And then I turned around and Mom had Andy. Who had been found by a lady in the women's underwear department, and who chewed out my mother for not holding his hand.

But, you know, two adults, three kids, all of us disoriented in the store... things happened.

We then went to a different store, where my mother purchased shorts and t-shirts for the boys. It was hot, see, and I hadn't been expecting it when I packed for our trip.

Only Nick, his face still stained with ice cream, purchased a toy with his allowance, and Andy, sweating and nap deprived, began crying because he had no toy. Nick then started swinging the bag with his new toy around in large circles. And Nate started jumping up and down the stairs to the kids department. And this is when I looked up and saw a woman I used to know when we were kids. Someone who looks just perfect and is dressed perfectly and looks fantastic, and is just there to buy her little boy some shoes... only he's not there. Apparently we aren't all crazy enough to actually bring our own kids to the store. Some of us do, and we are sweating and disheveled.

And Andy is screaming louder and louder, and just as this woman walks away, Nate says "My nose is bleeding!" and blood starts pouring out. So Jamie (who we ran into on the street and forced to come with us) scoops him up and sprints back to the apartment. Because he rocks.