Veterans Day Refection

On Friday the 3rd grade had its annual Veterans Day Concert.

I sat in a school gym with about 700 other parents and grandparents and aunts and uncles and younger siblings. We sat in the dark so they could project a waving American Flag onto a screen. It was noisy and crowded and uncomfortably warm.

I have issues with Veterans Day. It's hard to tackle this because usually my point of view comes across as anti patriotic and un-American, and these days that can be downright dangerous.

The concert was cute, and a little frightening in a "Look! We're brainwashing your children!" kind of way. Not that anyone seemed to notice. The boys and girls sang Yankee Doodle and America the beautiful. They sang You're A Grand Old Flag. Nick's class sang a medley of all the military songs - Off we go, into the wild blue yonder / Anchors away, my boys! /  Over hill, over dale / From the Halls of Montezuma.... There were a lot of class statements about America being #1! In fact, to me, the entire crowd could have been shouting "We're #1! We're #1!" We could have been at a hockey game.

The concert ended with a recording of that song, "I'm proud to be an American!" The whole crowd stood and sang and pumped their fists in the air.

And I thought, Really?

I consider myself a patriot. I really do. In my heart and my soul, I feel that I stand for American values like Freedom of speech and the right to vote and select our leaders. I value the right to speak out and the right to a fair trial.

But I'm not always proud to be an American.

Especially when I try and see us from the viewpoint of other countries.

We're cutting food stamps to hungry people. We made it so corporations are legally people. Banks get away with robbing people blind, and cops who spray unarmed, seated students in the face with pepper spray are awarded large amounts of cash for the trauma endured. Seriously, sometimes this country is so twisted it drives me crazy.

And the last line of the song? "God bless the USA!" Well, I'm an atheist. But if I did believe in God, I think that it would be a God who didn't bless the USA over any of the other countries in the world. USA would not, you know, get more presents than the other kids. Why not bless Peru or Namibia?

Am I the only one who thinks this way, I wonder? I mean, probably not in the world, not. Maybe not even the only one in the country. But in that gym, I sure felt like it. I suddenly felt like a subversive person. Like a spy. Like the Russians from The Americans.

As I mentioned, I do consider myself to be patriotic. I love my country. I love the land we live on and the measures we've taken so far in our shaky history to gain equality for all who live here. I wish we could apply the same rights to other peoples and countries, but that doesn't mean I don't appreciate what we have.

How could I reconcile my discomfort with certain things sanctioned by my government with what I felt was my patriotism? How could I explain to my nine-year-old that I loved seeing him sing, but that the last song left a bitter, chemical, GMO filled taste in my mouth?

During the concert, there were veterans in the audience. Some of them were in uniform, but not all. Some of them were parents, sitting next to their young children. Some of them were grandparents and uncles, looking as out of shape and thrown together as the rest of us. Some of them were older men with walkers. During the medley that Nick's class sang, these people - mostly men - stood up at different places. When they sang Over Hill Over Dale, a few men in the front stood up. When they sand From The Halls Of Montezuma others stood up - the veterans were standing when the children sang the song from their branch of the military. Anchors Away, and another wave of people stood up...

It was really very touching. Because these people that are standing up, they are not a country. They are not the government. They are people. They ARE people. They are parents and uncles and aunts.

Veterans day is not about the government. And despite the songs the children were singing, I don't feel as though it's really about America. It's about the veteran. It's about the individual person who might disagree with everything I think and everything I say, but who took his or her life and dedicated part of it, maybe even risked his or her life, to help keep safe my right to think my own thoughts and speak them aloud. They should be honored. The veteran. Not my thoughts.

I don't recall where I heard this. I didn't come up with it on my own. But I'd forgotten it until just this weekend. I'm gad I remembered it.