How To Start Your Day

I know I talk about poop a lot on this site. More than people would like, in any case. But you have to understand that I have two kids in different stages of potty training, and one two years away from it. I end up thinking about poop a lot.

Yesterday morning I changed the boys' diapers when they woke up as usual. Then we went down to eat breakfast. About an hour after I changed them the first time I walked up the stairs with a crying Andy in my arms. Nick and Nate were upstairs running around. I walked into their room to find Nate with no pants on. And no diaper. And a poopy bottom. "I changed Nate's diaper, Mom!" Nick said proudly. "But now he wants to wear underwear!" He held up a pair of Bob The Builder underpants.

But before I could address the underpants issue I realized Nate was climbing onto his bed. "Stay off the bed!" I shouted. I then tried to corral Nate back to the bathroom with one arm, Andy in the other, while trying to get Nick to tell me where he put the poopy diaper. Nick was not interested in the diaper, and was intent on telling me that he already wiped Nate's bottom.

In the bathroom the first thing I did was put Andy down on the bath mat. It was then that I realized he had also pooped. Because most of the poop had gone right up the back of his diaper - the rest of it down his leg. It had soaked right through his jammies and was all over the arm of my sweatshirt. And now all over the bathmat and - oh, he rolled over - the floor. Nate was also sitting on the floor. I no longer wanted to be standing on the floor.I had no idea where to even start cleaning up the boys, the mess... and they were still moving around.

So, seven am. I had to give the boys a bath and wash the bathroom floor. And the toilet. And the tub.

Note to self - it only seems like a good idea to let Nathan eat as many blueberries as he wants.
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