We decided that today would be the perfect day to take Nick to see Santa.

Make no mistake. This trip wasn't for Nick. We might tell people it was for Nick. We might tell each other, and even ourselves that it was for Nick. Who are we, as parents, to deprive our child from the joy of sitting on Santa's lap? The thing is, Nick is 18 months old. He couldn't care less about Santa. He has no idea who this old guy is.

But regardless, Steve and I made plans to meet at the mall at 11:40 so that we can catch Santa and, with luck, get a photo of Nicholas screaming as a helpless Santa tries to keep him from leaping off his lap.

What a bad idea.

I should have known we were in for trouble when I couldn't get Steve to understand where to meet me.
"Where is Santa?" he asked.
"Under the stairs."
"Stairs?"
"I think so, yeah. Right next to H&M."
"I have no idea where HMC is."
"OK.. then don't meet us there... what about the food court?"
"Where is that?"
"On the second floor..."
"No."
"OK - on the first floor," I said. "By those ride-on toys. Next to Ruby Tuesday's? At the end of the mall?"
"By Jordan Marsh?"
"Who? No - by one of the Department stores - I don't know which one. At the entrance to the Mall - the one at the end. You know where the pet store is? And CVS? The other side."
The mall is one long strip. So I assumed he'd know where I was talking about. How foolish I was.
Steve went to every single one of those stores. H & M. He went to the pet store. He even found ride on toys on the second floor.

By the time he found us on the first floor it was noon. We had been shopping since 10am, had visited the puppies, seen the short line for Santa, played with the toys at the Disney store and spent about 30 minutes inside KB Toys... We were ready to see Santa and go.

Santa was on a Lunch break. So we never did see him. I think I'm supposed to try again tomorrow. By myself. Which, by the way, would have been WAY easier than trying to to involve Steve in this rite of parenthood.

I thought the day couldn't get worse, but then Nick peed through his pants as he was sitting on my lap as I was coaxing him to eat Burger King fries (I know, I know - but HE HAD TO EAT!) Of course his change of clothes was in the car, and nice walk from the mall.

By the time we got home, Nicholas was asleep. I managed to get him out of his carseat and into the house. I changed his diaper and placed him in his crib... and that's when the screaming started. He's been in his crib for about an hour now. Not screaming, but talking. Playing. Just - and I want to be clear on this point - NOT SLEEPING.

And now I am off to a playdate involving a pool, which means there is a very good chance I will be attempting to squeeze my 8 months pregnant body into a swimsuit and then pretend that I look normal as I try to convince Nicholas that he is having the time in his life in the water, which is not scary at all.