Different Worlds

My kids get really into the toys they play with. Sometimes they can have entire conversations with adults, and the look on the adult's face goes from charmed, to confused, to alarmed, as my kids jabber on and an in what may as well be an alien language.

Here is a quick guide to a few of the games my kids are interested in, just so you can follow along if you ever get cornered.

Pokemon: Pokemon has been around for some time. There is a TV show and a few movies, in which Ash, a young boy, wanders around the world looking for Pokemon to capture and train. Pokemon are like animals with special powers, and in the shows they fight each others in arenas for general entertainment. Ash is always trying to win badges from gyms in different regions. The card game uses these pokemon, and I'm sure there is an official way to play, but as far as I can tell it usually involves a lot of squabbling. There are also video games where you do as Ash does, wander around, collect pokemon, and then fight other pokemon in an arena setting. They also sell stuffed animals and smaller figurines.

Bakugan: Bakugan is newer. There is a TV show, and a series of books. The premise is that cards from a different dimension began falling from the sky one day, and also little balls which are actually creatures called Bakugan. The kids on Earth like to play Bakugan, invented by Dan and his friends, Marucho, Alice, Runo, Julie, and Shun, all with strange colored hair. They don't realize it's not a game, it's real, and that bakugan are actual creatures from a different dimension. Once they figure this out, they have to save the world with their bakugan brawls against Masquarade, who for some reason wants the world to end. The game includes not just cards, but metalic cards and the little bakugan balls that pop open into creatures on the magnetic cards, and that you then have to figure out how to squeeze back into a stupid ball again, but you can't because it's almost impossible, and also the four-year-old who has it has already somehow snapped off a key part. There are also a few video games.

Beyblades: As far as I can tell beyblades are tops. They have beyblade launchers, which spin these metal tops really fast, and two of them spun together bump into each other until one of them stops spinning. It's best to do this in a beyblade arena, because the beyblades themselves are metal, and can ruin floors and bathtubs. Thanks, toy people! You sure are super! There is a TVB show that goes along with this. I haven't spent that much time watching it, but as far as I can tell, it's a bunch of kids using their tops - er, beyblades, to combat the evil forces of the universe through beyblade battles. There is a lot of running around, a lot of dramatic commercial break placement, and nothing ever actually gets solved. Also, there isn't a lot of school for these children. Beyblades sell not only the bey blades, but eleven different types of launchers, and quite a number of different arenas. They are all cheaply made and over priced. But again, the beyblades lower home value, so...

And that's al I've got, folks. I could go into other things, such as Gogos, but I really haven't got the engergy.