I don't alphabetize the contents of my refrigerator or anything.
I feel like I had to state that up front, before I say anything else. Because it's important to know that I have a normal fridge, and that the stuff in there is normal. Sure, I usually keep my milk on the top shelf and the mustard in the door shelf, but it's not like I'll freak out if the butter is on the bottom shelf instead of the middle shelf.
My fridge has become someone else's.
Specifically, my mother's.
If you open my parent's fridge you'll find it completely full. There is hardly ever room for a bottle or a juice box. But the thing is, there's never anything TO EAT in there. It's a scary thing. It's mostly full of condiments and spreads and leftovers and produce that all look scary. There's never any telling just how long anything has BEEN in there. Because they never throw anything away. They just buy more. When my parents moved my mother - I swear - packed condiments to move. We cleaned the fridge out one time when I was home from college and found mint jelly from 1989. And this was the mid '90's.
I opened my fridge tonight to find cheese, and it was like entering a different dimension. There are bowls of leftovers I don't remember eating. And some I DO remember eating... last week. There's yogurt and deli meats from WEEKS ago, not to mention spreads and dips and vegetables in baggies that - I can tell you thins right now - NO ONE is going to eat. I couldn't FIND the cheese because there was so much other junk in there.
My mother does not like to waste food. Neither do I. I take care of that problem by buying only what I know we will eat, and cooking only what we need. My mother thinks she can take care of the problem by not throwing anything away so we can eat it later. The trouble is, we don't. While my mother insists the turkey from three weeks ago is still good I am sure it is not.
I think I need to sneak down and clean the fridge in the middle of the night. Because I am starting to store baby bottles for feedings, and I am frankly not going to be able to find them if I have to dig behind all the inedible stuff that's in there.
FOR ALL WAITING FOR BABY PHOTOS - THEY ARE COMING, I PROMISE.
2 comments:
Ah, the fridge! And the cheese! At least it's in the fridge. In France it's kept under a dome on the counter til each different cheese runs to the next one & becomes really really odiferous & not in a good way. Even the French flinch. You know sometimes the fridge gets cleaned out when your Mom goes away or Em & I just gang up on her.
Oh Kathleen,
While you weren't looking, mom totally reclaimed that 1989 mint jelly from the trash and put it back in the fridge. It still lives with them today, somewhere where Linda cannot find it. Sometimes I suspect that our mother is secretly a brilliant biologist, performing experiments right under our noses, and that jelly may well hold the key to dismantling some major modern illness... Or perhaps it is the cause of some major modern illnesses: having barely passed bio, I won't waste your time trying to figure it out.
Love and love,
Emily.
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