Two Years Ago Today

I remember every detail about this day two years ago. Well... Fine. The drugs and the actual labor have made a couple of hours really really fuzzy, but they were always fuzzy. It isn't the same as the fuzziness time gives things.

Two years ago today I became a mother. It was an outrageous experience from the start, beginning with waking my brother up (he was visiting) at 7am to tell him we were leaving. The hospital we had registered in and toured sent us to Boston so we could be closer to a Neo-Natal Intensive Care Unit. We were so scared that stupid shadow on our last ultrasound meant something was wrong with Nick's heart. We got an ambulance ride to the other Hospital, and I still think the highlight of Steve's day was riding in front while the lights were flashing.

Nicholas was born either at 8:07 or 7:57, depending on if you beleive the birth certificate or Steve. I didn't even get to hold him before they whisked him off to the NICU, and I sent Steve after them. I went from being the center to attention in a crowded room to being left all alone - and I mean ALL ALONE - in the delivery room. I was hungry, I was lonely, and I was worried about my baby. I was also very jealous when Steve came back with polaroids of him holding Nicholas. But an hour later I got to go up and see him myself.

Today, in the present, Nicholas is sick. He has one of his colds, and he is miserable. Trying to keep him comfortable and hydrated is a miserable job. But it is totally worth it. It's ALL worth it.